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July 20, 2008 - 1:52 am
worst night ever
well tonight was probably one of the worst nights of my life. so bad that i was ready to buy a plane ticket for me and cadence so we could go to arizona and not come back.
jay walked out of the house an hour and a half ago all fucked up. just walked out of the fucking house. he's not back yet but when he does get back i'm either going to be so pissed that i ignore him or all hell is going to break loose.
you can't do that anymore! what the fuck don't you understand about RESPONSIBLITY and BABY. Have I walked out of the house in the middle of the nite lately? no... only once- 4 years ago
I am so alone and now I know why- I spent about 2 hours in thought tonight and I realized that by choice I do not talk to friends or family because no one can even comprehend what its like to be in my shoes. no one i know has been through what i've been through. beth's got a part of it but she fucking hates me right now and i don't know why. tara's got a part of it, but other than that she's can't understand what i'm going through- she's never even had a boyfriend...
megan's got 2 out of 3 but we haven't been close in 12 years; not going to start pouring my heart out to pratically a stranger. it sucks because i hate my life and i wish i could just put myself out of my misery but i could never harm myself because i don't want my daughter to grow up without a mother, and i could never ever hurt her like that. mom i could really use some advise right now- 6 months and my life is down the shitter. i really miss you
previous - next
archery instructor aka wonderwoman - September 25, 2017
missing jay! - September 15, 2017
trying to remember, and wishing I could forget - September 07, 2017
completely overwhelmed - September 05, 2017
16 girl scouts - August 25, 2017
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